So, you screwed up. And you screwed up so bad (or made a recovery so bad) that you know it’s pointless to ask forgiveness. You know you won’t be forgiven.
You should ask forgiveness anyway.
To ask forgiveness is about more than just getting forgiveness. It’s a step toward acknowledging and righting a wrong, and your body and soul know it. Have you ever tried burying those painful (even weak) but necessary words “I’m sorry” or “please forgive me”?
As weak as saying “I’m sorry” might make you feel – and as vulnerable to judgment and rejection – holding those important words in will make you weaker.
You have to be brave to be sorry and show it. Only if you are strong enough to realize that you may not be forgiven will you be strong enough to ask forgiveness. And only if you ask forgiveness might you get some of the freedom and space you need to forgive yourself.