Comparing yourself to other people is a losing game. You will find yourself disliking yourself and envying others, rarely feeling content. If you get what you want, it won’t feel like yours because you won’t be yourself.
Find a truer measurement.
There are many things against which you would be better off comparing yourself: your integrity, your adherence to your consciously-chosen values, your impact on the world, your previous self.
I’ve been finding it helpful lately to compare myself against my own childhood dreams and ambitions.
For instance, when I was young, I really thought I would be more of a badass. But at 23 (close to 24) I sit at a desk most of the day and live a pretty conventional – and therefore sedentary – life. Compared to my childhood dreams, I have a big gap of work to fill, and I’ve started doing that with distance trail running, along with more outdoor and physical adventures in general.
My list of childhood dreams goes on. I definitely thought I would have written a book by now. I definitely planned to have a farm. These dreams are my judges and my reminders that I’m not everything I planned to be, or everything I could be.
This self-comparison gives me no bitterness and no envy. Instead, it makes me excited. I’m reconnecting to the passion I had when I was a little kid. And I’m giving my younger self some wish fulfillment.